I don't understand why you could never see that Jessica fucking likes you. I kept telling you she made me uncomfortable, yet you only fully realized it when I sent you a damn paragraph about it, despite all the times I expressed vocally that I didn't like her. Why would you even get mad at me for emailing Jason back when YOU were on FACETIME with her so often right after we called or even before WE called. Playing games with her, doing love language quizzes because she asked, giving each other nicknames, letting her tell you "I love you," with you asking for them too, having a sleep call just because she randomly called you in the morning and went to sleep with you set up, telling ME not to worry since she was just a friend and she had a boyfriend too, making me feel like i was going crazy. To then confess to me that once I sent you that paragraph, you realized you were unconsciously doing it because of the lack of attention I was giving you when YOU knew very well what a Hell-of-a-week I was having. You KNEW my situation at that time, yet you did it anyway. I don't care whether you realized it or not, you should have NOT done that. You basically emotionally cheated on me. I didn't want to keep bringing her up because of the number of times she had been brought up. I hate hearing her name. I can't even eat dumplings now because of your nickname for her, "bao bun." It gets me nauseous, I can't hear/see anything Vietnam-related because it reminds me of her, anything that slightly reminds me of her just ruins my day. I don't think you realized how scared I was going through your phone. I was shaking, hoping that the past 9 months we had spent together weren't for nothing. We somehow managed to get through that mess, and I tried pretending I was fine, but my heart still ached, even though you told her to stop and told her not to contact you again, and I deleted her from everything you had her added, iMessages, Snapchat, Roblox, or just anywhere you guys talked. You got a lot of backhanded comments in the following weeks because I wasn't fully over it, which just made our situation even worse. I even though I said I was done with that situation. It had just been 2 days after our 10-month anniversary, and you had just brought up the breakup, and we mutually decided to break up. That HURT. It hurt losing you so much, even though we said it wouldn't last long, and that we were doing it to grow as individuals. You don't understand how much I cried for you in those days, my head was everywhere and nowhere at the same time, my feelings were all over the place. I couldn't eat, sleep, or just had no motivation at all. That week destroyed me. We barely contacted each other, and I honestly didn't know how to deal with my emotions. I pierced my ear myself as a way to distract myself, but when you told me you were talking to someone else, I just couldn't take it anymore because WHAT DO YOU MEAN!! It had just been a week of us breaking up. I honestly thought you never cared about me at all. I thought that what we had just been for nothing, and that was the full reason for the breakup. Just to find out a week later, you made her up. Trying to get me to move on from you. We're still in full contact, but now I'm more confused than ever. I still love you, and you love me, but idk what's going on anymore. What are we now? Like I'm genuinely asking because I can't tell.